all the time

This song was inspired in part by a conversation with Jim Lincoln about loving and praising GOD with our minds - that is, being intentional and intelligent in the way we regard and worship GOD. I wrote it to express my determination to rightly think about GOD. I think that the word "want" can be interpreted in several ways. Often it is meant to express a desire: "I want to see that movie," or "I want to get ice cream." But at other times we use it to express a goal: "I want to finish this book by the end of the week," or "I want to lose 10 lbs." It is more in the latter sense that I wrote this song; as my affections waver and I do not always feel like praising GOD, I know it is always the right attitude so I set it before me as a goal. As He is faithful all the time, I want to recognize that all the time.

i want to praise You with my life, my heart, and my mind
i want to praise You all the time, all the time

You amaze me all the time, Your love saves me all the time
You are with me all the time, and You forgive me all the time
and that is why

i want to praise You with my life, my heart, and my mind
i want to praise You all the time, all the time

You protect me all the time, You direct me all the time
You redress me all the time, and you bless me all the time
and that is why

i want to praise You with my life, my heart, and my mind
i want to praise You all the time, all the time

 

You are my song

This is a simple song that came out one day while I was attempting to write a completely different one...

i sing in the morning, You prepare me for the day
i sing in the afternoon, You cast my cares away
i sing in the evening and You help me to hold on
i sing without ceasing 'cause You are my song

i sing when i'm afraid, You calm all my fears
i sing when i am sad, You wipe away my tears
i sing when i am weak and You make me strong
then i sing rejoicing 'cause You are my song

You are the song i sing, my ever-present hymn
my eternal melody, and i can't get You out of my head

i sing when i'm walking, You are my guide
i sing in the darkness, You are my light
i sing when i've fallen and You forgive what i've done wrong
then i sing with thankfulness

You are the song i sing, my ever-present hymn
my eternal melody, and i can't get You out of my head

i sing when i'm alone, You are so near to me
i sing when i'm with my friends, You're beautiful in harmony
i sing to those who have not heard and they want to sing along
so i sing proclaiming that You are my song
You are my song
You are my song

 

enter in

I was standing in a French worship service alongside my youth group kids one afternoon when this song began. I was going through the motions of worship outwardly, but not allowing my heart to be engaged. Well, this had been somewhat of a pattern and GOD decided that just wasn't going to cut it any more, and we were going to (right then and there) confront some of my issues. I was faced with the fact that it wasn't just complacency as much as pride and distrust and fear that I had let get wedged in between us, and that I'd actually been avoiding meeting with Him. So as I'm standing there under conviction, feeling like the worst Christian/missionary ever, this chorus began to rise from the depths of my soul...

it's so easy just to stand,
to move my lips and clap my hands
who can tell the difference?
it's so easy just to rise
to bow my head and close my eyes
and wait for the "amen"

but GOD Almighty is wanting to meet with me
so why would i settle for any less?

i want to enter in, don't want to stay where i am
all my pride, distrust, and fear
i want to leave right here
and i want to enter in your presence
to approach your throne with confidence
leaving nothing in between us, JESUS
i want to enter in

 

becoming less

Oh my, it would take pages to explain this song - every line carries such weight for me. It's three years of my life squeezed into three minutes. I walked around Montauban singing the chorus for two years, wondering how I would ever say what I wanted to say in the span of a couple verses, and then one day, the verses came out, and to this day I am shocked that it all fit in there.

You invited me to experience You
i quickly donned my princess gown
in exchange for the rags i was wearing
i was more than happy to put on a crown

all dressed up, now where would i go?
i let my imagination run free
but i was making the classic mistake
of thinking the story was all about me

You pull these things from my clenched fists
You do so in Your gentleness
until You are my very breath
until i see the greatness
in becoming less

i found in me what i'd hated in others
and i found in You what was lacking in us all
i learned for real the meaning of the words "to fall short"
and i learned for real the meaning of grace that abounds

so i let go of what i held only in illusion
and stood in awe of Your sovreignty
'cause You have plans that You're going to accomplish
and You want me to be part of Your glory

well, the army says, "be all you can be"
and the teachers tell us to reach for the stars
but You said we must die to ourselves
if we want to find out who we really are

 

may you: a wedding prayer

Rebekah (Lincoln) Hsieh, my best friend since the age of 14, asked me to be her maid of honor for her August '03 wedding. A bit nervous, knowing I'd be responsible for giving a toast, I began to write it in January. So I was thinking a lot about what I wanted to wish her for her marriage, and I was looking up a lot of Bible verses on the subject, and instead of a speech, this prayer-set-to-music came out.

may you see the world anew
may the glimmer of your eyes never fade
may you be fruitful and multiply
may you dance when you're old and gray

may you grow in grace and faith
may you know how cherished you are
may you stay faithful to the vows made on this day
may you make each other laugh hard

may you become as one flesh
may you live in unity
may you care for her as Christ for the church
may you respect him accordingly

may you bring out the best in each other
may Christ be the center of your home
may you enjoy each day He gives you together
may you have peace wherever you go

but above all these things, my sister and my brother,
may you love one another
without condition
may you love one another

 

My beloved

At age 19 when I was learning to play guitar, I wrote a song called "The Best Is Yet To Come" which included a verse about getting married (as a future event I was looking forward to). Five years later at 24, I decided it was time to write a song about singleness. So this is it: my ode to dealing with people's questions and suggestions, to my own attempts and disappointments, and to the GOD who calls me into His arms when those things drive me to doubt and dismay.

When I was little, I was never too fond of my first name because it was very common in my generation. There were always three or four other Amys in my grade. But over the years, I have come to cherish it because my name actually means "beloved" - it comes from the French adjective "aimee" - and now I cannot imagine being named anything else.

Often when I cry out to GOD, He responds by calling me "My beloved." It is such a beautiful thing when He says it.

it's not a curse 'cause i've done wrong
it's not even for lack of trying
it goes both ways, we did not see the same thing
i choose to blame the timing
and they say i am playing hard to get
and i say, no, he's playing hard to find
and i run to Your arms, they are wide open

i've seen too much of real life
to be conned by the fairy tales
no fooling me, eternal bliss only comes
from the Love that never fails
and they say i am getting too old
and i say, maybe i'm getting too wise

and i run to Your arms, they are wide open
to hear You say, You say
"My beloved, My beloved"
You say, "My beloved, My beloved"

i won't deny there's loneliness
as i follow You to my chief end
but i will not stray from this path You've led me down
just to find a friend
and they say i don't know what i'm missing
and i say they don't know what i have

and i run to Your arms, they are wide open
to hear You say, You say
"My beloved, My beloved"
You say, "My beloved, My beloved"
(You're all i need and You say)
You say, "My beloved, My beloved"
(it's a beautiful thing when you say)

 

you'll come to me

At age 26, I wrote this song. Just in case the last one had scared anyone off...heh heh heh...When I released "Becoming Less" with a concert in Nov. '04, I introduced this song by saying, "And now it's time for Silly Songs with Amy." I started writing it purely for my own amusement. As I wrote it, I kept telling myself, "You CAN'T write a song like this." But it was just SO MUCH fun to sing that I couldn't stop. It still delights me to no end...

you don't have to be perfect
a sense of humor will suffice
you don't have to slay dragons
just spiders and mice
you don't have to be royalty
just noble and wise
you don't have to wear shining armor
just shield me from wayward eyes

i wait and i wonder
but they say
that some day
you'll come to me
and sweep me off my feet
so i say
in that case
i'll run to you
and throw my arms around your neck
and you will be mine
and i will be yours
we'll be as one

well, i don't know much about spinning wool
and i've never purchased a field
but i'd show you in other ways
that my love is real
and i'd bring you good and care for you
all the days of my life
and i want to be so virtuous that
you'd thank GOD i'm your wife

 

as You dance with me

This is the great romance I live out every day with a GOD whose movements I can't predict but who I commit to follow because of the grace that leaves me breathless. This song serves a dual purpose in telling both my story and the bigger story of JESUS and His bride. Many people have told me it's their favorite on the album, so it must tell their story as well.

with a wave of Your hand, You struck up the band
and they began to play our song
You said simply, "keep your eyes on Me and follow as I lead,
You'll never go wrong."

Your steps were surprising, but Your timing was perfect
You moved with a grace like i'd never seen
and though i was clumsy, Your hand led me steadily
we glided as one as You danced with me

as we danced, i felt a tap on my shoulder, others asked
if they could have this dance, i said, "yes."
at first, it was fun, how we swayed and we spun
but soon they were done, they left me a mess

i looked up to see You coming towards me
Your hands extending, i saw Your scars
i knew right then and there how much You cared
and that i belonged nowhere but in Your arms

 

again

My dad left us for heaven in April 2002, almost two years after we learned he had cancer. He was one of the best men I ever knew and there is still rarely a day that goes by that I don't think about him and ache. But, though I'd love to have him back, I wouldn't take him away from where he is now for the world...so mostly I just long to be there myself.

for me to say how much i miss you is impossible
it's every day, in everything, and everywhere
what i wouldn't give just to hold your hand
just to be with you
to hear your voice just one more time

why He saw fit that you should go
i may never know this side of heaven
but i know you're with Him now
so i am holding out
for the day we'll be together again

you prepared to go with such beauty
and with such grace, with such a sense of what was real
and you said how proud that you were of me
but it's me who's left beaming with pride

why He saw fit that you should go
i may never know this side of heaven
but i know you're with Him now
so i am holding out
for the day we'll be together again

and though it's often today that i wish was that day
until then i cling to the One who has overcome death
and given me the hope that there will be an again

 

up the mountain

This song came out during the beginning of my second year in France. A friend had sent me a very sweet letter in response to one of my prayer letters, complimenting me on my focus on ministry and joking that, when she was my age, she was focused on getting things like a dining room table. But, though I was passionate about ministering in France, I was also wrestling with what I was leaving behind and trying to reconcile certain desires with my calling. I wanted stuff like everybody else. But when it came right down to it, the reality was unavoidable: it just doesn't make any sense to long for a dining room table when you don't have a dining room to put it in.

we met at the foot of the mountain
You said we had somewhere to go
that irresistable look of love in Your eyes
and i was sure to follow You
but before we left i just had to ask
the inevitable female questions,
"what should i wear?" and "what will i need?"
and "what can i bring?"

imagine my surprise when You smiled at me
and said, "nothing
but a willing heart, and two empty hands,
and as we go along you'll come to understand.
'cause what would you do with a table?
you don't have a dining room.
He who had nowhere to lay His head
will take care of you too."

we started our journey up the mountain
You gave me Your hand to hold
You showed me such wonders as we traveled along
but i was in awe just to know You
but after a while, i fell behind
and You asked why i was walking so slowly
well, i'd snuck in a few plans,
and i'd kept a few dreams,
and i'd brought a few useful things

You smiled, shook Your head,
and said, "leave those burdens here and trust Me
with a willing heart, and two empty hands,
and as we continue on you'll better understand.
'cause what would you do with a table?
you don't have a dining room.
He who had nowhere to lay His head
will take care of you too.
I'll take care of you.

and I'll dress you like a flower,
and I'll feed you like the birds,
and you never had it so good."

 

the return of the King

As one might suspect, this was inspired by the film, or rather, it was inspired by the movie poster sporting a larger-than-life Aragorn that Emily got me for my birthday which hung at the foot of my bed in my Montauban apartment...to remind me of the spiritual principles in the movie, of course. In any case, it did cause me to think about the return of the King that I'm waiting for.

weary traveler, lift up your eyes
your help comes from on high
to take the burdens you bear
i know it seems so long, this road
but this promise lightens the load
and you find your hope there

it will be worth every step, worth every mile
worth every tear, every scar, every trial
with the lame, we will dance
with the mute, we will sing
with the deaf, we'll hear trumpets announcing
the return of the King

weary traveler, look to the sky
you will see it open up wide
he'll take you up into the air
no more wandering, crying, or pain
no more sunshine to break through the rain
'cause He will be the Light there

He comes to you now in a whisper
to guide you on your way
but He's coming back in His splendor
one day, some day...

 

mon amour pour vous  my love for you

This is the goodbye song that I wrote and performed for my French friends before moving back to Oregon from Montauban in July 2004. It pretty much speaks for itself.

bien que je parle   even though i speak
votre langue comme un enfant   your language like a child
bien que je ne comprenne pas   even though i don't understand
tout ce que vous me dites   everything you say to me
bien que je n'aime pas trop les bises   even though i don't really like the double-cheek kiss
et je n'aie jamais appris a boire le vin   and i never learned to like the wine
chaleureusement vous m'avez accueillie   you all welcomed me so warmly
et vous m'avez aime comme une famille   and you loved me like a family

et mon amour pour vous est plus vaste   and my love for you is more vast
que l'ocean qui nous separera   than the ocean that will separate us
vous etes encres dans mon coeur   you're inscribed on my heart
et vous resterez dans mes pensees et mes prieres   and you'll remain in my thoughts and prayers
a jamais   always

on dirait qu'il y a trop de choses,   one might say there are too many things,
humainement parlant, qui nous divise   humanly speaking, that divide us
les differences de langue et de culture   that the differences of language and culture
creent un ocean impassable entre nous   create an impassable ocean between us
mais le Seigneur fait des merveilles par Son Esprit   but the Lord does wonders by His Spirit
Il fait des etrangers une famille   He makes of strangers a family

et Son amour pour nous est plus vaste   and His love for us is more vast
que l'ocean qui nous separe   than the ocean that separates us
nous sommes encres dans Son coeur   we're inscribed on His heart
et nous resterons dans Ses pensees et Ses mains   and we'll remain in His thoughts and His hands
a jamais   always

j'ai souvent eu du mal a m'exprimer   i've often had a hard time expressing myself
alors c'est pas une grande surprise que   so it's not a big surprise that
j'ai du mal a vous dire << au revoir >>   it's hard for me to say "goodbye" to you

mon amour pour vous est plus vaste   my love for you is more vast
que l'ocean qui nous separe   than the ocean that separates us
vous etes encres dans mon coeur   you're inscribed on my heart
et vous resterez dans mes pensees et mes prieres   and you'll remain in my thoughts and prayers
a jamais   always

 

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